Another Paper Treiger – guest blog edition

When my friends suggest topics for me to blog about, I don’t usually have time to humor them. That isn’t to say I haven’t – here are two examples of reader-submitted topics that made it into posts – but in general, I give them the same offer: write a guest blog! Here are some real examples:

friend (who shall not be named): can you explain the rationale behind these axe showerpooling ads? like, i get the sex thing, but what’s this nonsense of water conservation? do environmentalists really think that shower sex will conserve water? you should blog about it
me: guest blog!
friend: not worth it
me: are you trying to say your time is more valuable than mine?
friend: precisely

friend: did you see the ajws hamentasch info graphic? it really frustrates me, because infographics are supposed to be about presenting a lot of information in a compact and aesthetically pleasing manner. all this is is three points on three sides of a hamentasch. there is no reason for the hamentasch to be there.
me: you can write an anonymous guest post!
friend: no. i’m only a private curmudgeon.

friend: your blog is stuck again.
me: you mean i havent posted in a while?
friend: 😦
me: feel free to guest blog 😉

friend: here’s a blog post for you: how can rapunzel’s parents in tangled be so great if they’re willing to execute some guy for theft? or they’re willing to turn a blind eye to such sentencing from their subordinates?
me: guest post!
friend: haha i knew you would say that

So it was when my brother suggested a topic,  I gave my usual response: guest blog! And for the first time ever, my offer was accepted. You see, a little self-interest can go a long way. But it’s for a good cause, so give him a listen:


Hi everybody!  (Does anyone actually read this blog?)  This is Shmuel, aka Mordechai’s brother, better known as Shmu of justshmuit “fame”.  Anyway, I’m guest blogging to promote my petition asking Mars to make Skittles Kosher.  I’ll keep this short, because it should be fairly self-explanatory (it’s Kosher Skittles, come on), but I’ll include the reasons I listed on the petition for why you [Shmu?] should sign:

Thousands of observant Jewish children and adults around the globe are deprived of the opportunity to eat this delicious candy.  The truth is that it would be relatively easy to make Skittles kosher since they no longer contain gelatin.  Indeed, Skittles used to be Kosher in the UK, meaning that there is already a market-tested formula which could easily be put back into use.  Many Mars products already have Kosher supervision, making it even easier and cheaper to simply add one more product to their Kosher repertoire.

If enough people sign this petition, it will demonstrate to Mars that there is enough of a demand to justify the economics of making Skittles Kosher.  Let’s make this happen!

P.S.  If you like the petition, be sure to share it on Facebook!  We need more signatures!

While all of these are good reasons for wanting Kosher Skittles, most readers of this blog already know the real reason I want to eat Skittles. If only Skittles had been Kosher last Sunday, Marshawn might not have had to switch to Butterfingers. Go Hawks


Mordechai again. The petition’s current target is, appropriately, 1800 signatures. At the time of this posting, it had exactly 99 — so I am happy to take any and all credit for every subsequent signature. It’s kind of like a minyan.

Also, this blog has had some success in the past with petitions, so let’s go 2-for-2!


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