So consider yourself warned.
No, I’m not planning to write about the map of Vaguely Rude Places Names of the World, though you should definitely hit that up. Instead, I’m writing about the seemingly-frequent congruence of name and destiny: the Slaughter who goes on to become a butcher, the Manly who goes on to become the manliest man there ever was.
My favorite recent example turned up in a New York Times piece on whether the US Supreme Court might allow television cameras to record its hearings. After chronicling the shifting positions of the two most-recently seated justices, Kagan and Sotomayor, the Times turned to relevant practices abroad:
The Supreme Court of the United Kingdom, which was formed in 2009, allows camera coverage. Last month, Lord Chief Justice Igor Judge, the head of the judiciary for England and Wales, announced that cameras would be allowed in appeal courts starting in October, after judges receive media training.
Thanks to my helpful priming, you should have had no trouble picking out “Lord Chief Justice Judge.” Almost too easy. But it’s what came next that prompted me to write something up:
Lord Judge agreed with Justice Sotomayor, to a point. “I suspect John and Jane Citizen will find it incredibly dull,” he told a committee of the House of Lords. But that did not seem to him a reason to prevent them from trying to make sense of the proceedings.
You almost have to consider the possibility that Chief Justice Judge was referring to an actual couple: first names John and Jane, last name Citizen.