But neither side in the standoff — neither those who requested snacks nor those who sent dildos — identified what #yallqaeda really and truly needs. If only they’d read the New York Times:
Each morning at 4, a man named Duane Ehmer takes Hellboy on a pre-dawn inspection of the refuge, an 1860 cavalry pistol clipped to his hip. “I’m looking for anybody that ain’t supposed to be there,” he said.
Forget “supplies or snacks or anything“. What these guys could really use is a mirror.
Update: Mr. Ehmer appears to have been taken into custody approximately half an hour following the publication of this post.