That’s my joke, dammit Colbert! Part II

The day after Groundhog Day, Colbert outed himself as a ‘Groundhog denier’: “I don’t think all the science is in on whether weather-forecasting rodents exist.” I’d share a link to the clip, but sadly, last Tuesday’s episode will only be up for a few more hours before it disappears into the virtual oblivion of CBS All Access (a gross misnomer, given that a number far short of “All” can access it).

Since you probably can’t watch the clip for yourself, here’s the line that caught my attention: “But I just don’t buy it [Editor’s note: Groundhog Day]: How much ground could a groundhog hog if a groundhog could hog ground?”

That line caught my attention for a very simple reason: I tweeted almost the exact same thing precisely six years before Colbert.

Put a little differently, Colbert repeated my thoughts on their sixth anniversary. And while I was certainly first (to be fair, third ever in history… on Twitter), I believe my iteration was far superior for another reason as well: I seized the opportunity to provide some essential educational context:

That’s right: groundhogs and woodchucks are the same damn animal. Don’t believe me? These guys are never, ever wrong:

But Colbert wholly failed to note this important scientific information. Indeed, he appears to remain blissfully ignorant that his joke ran any deeper than a groundchuck’s burrow. And honestly, that couldn’t come as less of a surprise. Comedic genius he may be, but it’s unfortunately well-established that Colbert is no expert on rodent classification.

For reference: That’s my joke, dammit Colbert! Part I


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